am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
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