I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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