The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
