after a month anything with tits is on the radar
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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