birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
No subtext here. People are naked.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
