I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
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Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
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We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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