watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
