so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
