What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
