He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Randomize
