Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize