his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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