Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
