Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Alive.
So much puke
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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