i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
