I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
