you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize