This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
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