he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I'm having to shit out rocks
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