I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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