Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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