When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
