We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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