i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
