; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize