I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
