i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize