a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
We have started to decorate penises.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
