I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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