you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
