But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
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i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
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I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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