Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
