You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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