3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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