I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Just puked most of my soul out..
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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