Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
third nipple confirmed
Randomize