Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
