That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
