I'm laying in your front yard are you home
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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