I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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