He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
