atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize