we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
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Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
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Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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