I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize