Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
