May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
