ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize