3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
