your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Do you have feelings for this penis?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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