Texts From Last Night

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  (225): View more from Louisiana

  shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this

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  (225): shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this http://tfl.nu/x9rq
  Replies (27) Good night (3230) Bad night (494)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.

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  (240): captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink. http://tfl.nu/r79d
  Replies (11) Good night (1051) Bad night (3274)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning

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  (616): a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning http://tfl.nu/f62h
  Replies (29) Good night (5848) Bad night (1114)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up

  (1-609): View more from New Jersey

  i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  ravioli

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  (609): So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up (1-609): i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one (609): ravioli http://tfl.nu/eoaw
  Replies (38) Good night (4974) Bad night (2647)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"

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  (208): The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?" http://tfl.nu/toa2
  Replies (17) Good night (7744) Bad night (1601)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand

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  (908): i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand http://tfl.nu/4jef
  Replies (17) Good night (5231) Bad night (934)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'

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  (541): His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.' http://tfl.nu/mg36
  Replies (9) Good night (973) Bad night (5330)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.

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  (313): Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose. http://tfl.nu/p7by
  Replies (14) Good night (2812) Bad night (1014)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.

  (1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

  What did you cook with whisky?

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  We started a fire.

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  (306): We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky. (1-306): What did you cook with whisky? (306): We started a fire. http://tfl.nu/4y3v
  Replies (11) Good night (5935) Bad night (1131)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Who is this?

  (1-603): View more from New Hampshire

  You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?

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  (603): Who is this? (1-603): You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo (603): Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this? http://tfl.nu/iabt
  Replies (5) Good night (2530) Bad night (878)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.

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  (727): Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time. http://tfl.nu/hhge
  Replies (9) Good night (948) Bad night (1883)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night

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  (410): that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night http://tfl.nu/xnkt
  Replies (4) Good night (1340) Bad night (755)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.

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  (651): You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with. http://tfl.nu/zaia
  Replies (4) Good night (913) Bad night (1078)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!

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  (404): It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs! http://tfl.nu/8k9t
  Replies (4) Good night (591) Bad night (246)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.

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  (413): dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME. http://tfl.nu/zc45
  Replies (3) Good night (562) Bad night (235)

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