Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
